August 12, 2014

Thoughts on Robin Williams & The Terrible Whisper of Depression...








As a child of the 70's, I grew up watching Robin Williams.  I had the "Mork and Mindy" rainbow suspenders.  I watched him on Letterman and Live Aid.  I fell in love with him in "World According to Garp".  I wept in dark movie theaters watching "Awakenings", "Dead Poet's Society" and "Good Will Hunting".  

I spent an evening in NY last week, walking around Grand Central Station, remembering that waltz scene from "Fisher King".




Everyone has been commenting about his death.  I think it's good we are talking about depression and suicide.  But this time, I don't have many words. 


Except to say that DEPRESSION LIES (to quote the bloggess.)  

I watched my father battle similar demons as a child.  I fight my own battles against depression.


It's a wind whispering terrible things in your ear.  It's a dark cloud over your head, the black dog on the bed.





Anyways, I just started to make some lists and it's just stunning, how many people we lose to depression, addiction, and general deep pain in being human.  It's also been happening for ages.

Suicides of Artists I love (In My Lifetime) 

  • Phillip Seymour Hoffman (actor)
  • Elliot Smith (musician)
  • Freddie Prinze (actor, "Chico and the Man", loved that show as a kid)
  • Hunter S. Thompson (writer)
  • Charlie Rocket (on 1 season of SNL, had a crush on him as a kid)
  • John O'Brien (author of "Leaving Las Vegas")
  • Spaulding Grey (actor, writer, "Swimming to Cambodia")
  • Paul Hester (drummer of Crowded House)
  • Richard Manuel (musician)
  • Kurt Cobain (musician)
  • Wendy O'Williams (musician)


Suicides of Artists I love (Before My Lifetime) 

  • Diane Arbus (photographer)
  • Ernest Hemingway (and his father, his brother and sister, and his granddaughter)
  • Francesca Woodhouse (photographer)
  • Syliva Plath (poet)
  • Anne Sexton (poet)
  • Virgina Wolf (poet)
  • Lupe Velez (actress)
  • Nick Drake (musician)


Not Really Suicides, But Death by Addiction/ Overdose

  • Chris Farley (comedian, actor)
  • Heath Ledger (actor)
  • Frederick Exley (writer)
  • John Belushi (comedian, actor)
  • John Cassavetes (actor, director)
  • Michael Hutchence (musician- INXS)
  • Richard Pryor (comedian, actor)
  • Rick Danko (musician)
  • Jason Molina (musician) 
  • Amy Winehouse (musician)
  • Marilyn Monroe (actor)
  • Lenny Bruce (comedian)


People I Know In Life Who've Lost Someone to Suicide:
  • AK (sister)
  • SN (brother)
  • AF (boyfriend)
  • RL (Cousin)
  • SA (family friend)
  • JM (friend) 
  • EO (brother)



"Depression is one of the most tragically misunderstood words in the English language"






A black eyed dog he called at my door
The black eyed dog he called for more
A black eyed dog he knew my name
A black eyed dog he knew my name
The black eyed dog, a black eyed dog
I'm growing old and I wanna go home
I'm growing old and I don't wanna know
I'm growing old and I wanna go home
A black eyed dog he called at my door
A black eyed dog he called for more



I found this image as part of an art series called "When Grown Men Cry".  Intense stuff.  This pic kind of breaks my heart.



Here's a link to his appearance on Louise last season.





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